Co-Parenting: What Does That Actually Mean?

Co-Parenting is a family model in which starting a family is approached independently of a love relationship. You can find out here what co-parenting is all about!

What does co-parenting mean?

• Co-Parenting is an English term that is made up of the word Co = together and Parenting = parenthood. It describes a family model in which the parents of the child do not live in a partnership, but have consciously started a family. The procreation of the child usually takes place without sexual intercourse, for example using the cup method.
• The basic idea behind this family model is that women and men have a biological child and raise it together, even if there is no love relationship. It is therefore an alternative family concept in which the desire to have children and the love relationship are considered independently. Co-parenthood can therefore also exist when a homosexual couple decides to have a child with a co-father or co-mother. According to the law, however, only two people can take custody of a child.
• In a broader definition, co-parenthood also exists when at least two people take responsibility for a child by common consent, always with the child’s well-being as the primary consideration. In this perspective, co-parenthood therefore also exists in the case of divorced or separated partners or adopted children.

Co-Parenting: What makes the family model so interesting?

• Co-parenting is a conscious decision to raise a child together – it is not a love relationship between the parents. This family model can therefore be particularly attractive when the desire to have children exists but the right partner has not (yet) been found. When planning children, women in particular often have the biological clock in the back of their minds, which puts additional time pressure on the search for a partner. Through co-parenting, at least the desire to have children is no longer bound to the search for and finding of a partner.
• For homosexuals, co-parenting is a way to have a child of their own. Homosexual couples can also use co-parenting to fulfil their desire to have children, whereby only one partner is the biological parent and a co-father or co-mother is added.
• In co-parenting, the well-being of the child is paramount. In contrast to conventional family models, the child is not burdened during his or her development by possible partnership conflicts in the parents’ love relationship.

What are the challenges of co-parenting?

• Even if the respective other parent is not the love partner, the parents enter into a lasting relationship when the child is conceived. Different ideas about upbringing and division of tasks offer conflict potential as well as lack of or poor communication.
• Particularly in the case of physically separated parenthood, agreements are very important – if these are missing or not adhered to, the family model can quickly reach its limits. Equally crucial for successful co-parenthood are the skills to manage conflicts and share responsibility – so the choice of the other parent should be well-considered and not frivolous.
• People with a desire to have children who want to co-parent usually get to know each other on corresponding websites – but as with the search for a partner in love life, the challenge is to meet someone who is in harmony with your own ideas and values. A basis of trust is just as essential as open and honest contact and a friendly relationship. A long phase of getting to know someone should therefore not be underestimated.

Co-parenting may sound unfamiliar to many – but it is basically just another form of family where people take care of a child without being in a love relationship.